that’s what she said.

To my Mom (though I would be mortified if she ever read my blog), and all the other baby mamas and pet mamas out there!

May your day be filled with tasty brunches, cards with macaroni glued to them, handprint reliefs, and gratitude that this isn’t your child:

Ralph Hardy, a 13 year old from Newark, Texas confessed to ordering an extra credit card from his father’s existing credit card company, and took his friends on a $30,000 spending spree, culminating in playing “Halo” on an Xbox with a couple of hookers in a Texas motel…

The escort girls who were released without charge, told the arresting officers something was up when the kids said they would rather play Xbox than get down to business.

Police said they were alerted to the motel by a concerned delivery clerk, whom after delivering supplies of Dr Pepper, Fritos and Oreos had been asked by the kids where they could score some chicks and were willing to pay. They explained they had just made a big score at a “World of Warcraft” tournament and wanted to get some relaxation. On noting the boys age the delivery clerk informed the authorities.

When police arrived at the motel they found $3,000 in cash, numerous electronic gadgets, an Xbox video console with numerous games, and the two local escort girls.

Ralph had reportedly told police that his father wouldn’t mind, as it was his birthday last week and he had forgot to get him a present. The father, a lawyer said he had been too busy, but would take him on a surprise trip to Disneyland instead.

Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a “World of Warcraft” tournament. They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played “Halo” on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling their sexual services.

Ralph’s ambition is to one day become a politician.

Okay, I know it’s totally wrong to say this, but that’s kind of awesome. Heh.

more cat pictures

This weekend, we’ve temporarily added a third brachycephalic dog to our menagerie. Sanna and Luke have left us in charge of their adorable French Bulldog/Boston Terrier mix dog, Henry. There’s a lot of running in circles and playing keep-away, and lots of snorting/wheezing/sneezing/drooling. We decided to take the trio on a walk to Volunteer Park, which is close by, followed by a rest stop at Top Pot. I practiced herculean self-restraint by sharing a Double Trouble doughnut with C. We had, after all, been walking for an hour! I don’t know if that burned enough calories to negate the doughnut, but it sure felt like it.
Finally, the dogs are tuckered out. We’re sacked out on the couch, C and I tapping away on our laptop computers like praying mantises, as usual. Henry, however, seems more interested in exploring the apartment than taking nap. Every so often, he’ll put his head on C’s keyboard to ask for attention. Cute. I must get a picture ASAP.

Tonight, we’re going to see Margaret Cho at the Paramount Theatre. So excited! I’m making C and I a pre-show meal with a grilled, frenched rack of lamb with fresh herbs (based on an recipe I saw here), grilled zucchini, and couscous. I’d like to incorporate wild mushrooms into the couscous — we have a bag of mixed organic mushrooms (it includes chanterelle, wood ear, porcini, shiitake, and morel) that I’ve been wanting to use. Not sure how I’m going to do that, though. Maybe just throw them in during cooking? Or round out the flavor by using a vegetable stock as the liquid and adding some onions, celery, and oregano? We’ll see what happens.

After dinner, we’re meeting friends at one of my favorite bars in Seattle, Chapel, before heading to the show. Yum, martinis.

But for right now, we’re just chilling on the couch. C’s got Henry on his lap and Ripley cuddled next to his leg. Sid’s got his head on my lap. The AppleTV is pulling some totally random tunes from my collection to listen to. The last few songs have been (from most to least recent):

• “Expectations” - Belle & Sebastian
• “Soundtrack of Now” - Miss Kittin
• “Electronaut” - VNV Nation
• “Maraca” - Sleater-Kinney
• “We Are the Champions” - Queen
• “Please Mr. Postman” - The Marvelettes
• “Selbstsucht” - Feindflug
• “New York City Boy” - Pet Shop Boys

…because hard German noise-industrial should always be followed by 70’s Motown.

So far, this is shaping up to be a damn good Saturday.

The other night, I had a dream that I was being awoken from a deep sleep, the kind where you have to steel yourself and force your eyes open. Once I finally forced my eyes to open — barely — my father (who passed away about 4 years ago) was waving at me from the foot of my bed. Waving, like you would if you saw someone you knew from across the street. I recall feeling a little aghast about it, and closed my eyes again and pretended to go back to sleep, wondering what the protocol was in a situation like this. Is this some kind of Ghost of Christmas Past type of thing, where I’m supposed to get up? Or when faced with this kind of situation, does one just say hi? After all, he was waving. Was I supposed to wave back? Was this supposed to be some sort of meaningful moment? Because all it felt was awkward. So, in my dream, not knowing what to do, I closed my eyes, said a little prayer, and went back to sleep.

I woke up the next morning recalling how vivid the dream was. I can’t recall too many dreams in the first place, let alone those where my father makes an appearance. I’ve had thoughts that perhaps it wasn’t a dream at all, but that just sounds crazy. But how odd is it to have a dream about dreaming?

Who knows. Maybe all this means is that I should lay off the fat-free ice cream right before bed. All this Splenda is probably making me hallucinate.

C, while playing GTA: “Whoa, I’ve got a bat? Awesome! I gotta go beat someone with this bat.”

Which he did, and then promptly got his ass killed by a throng of po-po. Ha, ha.

How cool is it that the radio stations in the game are playing Nitzer Ebb, Sisters of Mercy, and Killing Joke?